Love what we are ASKING.
The Family Strengthening practice model is the national leader of strength-based essential skill development for improving communication and family formation that positively influences family development.
Love asks nothing of another person, but to be who they are – no what ifs, no maybes, not buts. When we are in a relationship with another person, it is a habit to project unrealistic expectations on another person. As human beings, we always want to be in control – be in control of what people say and do because that is who we expect them to be. Just because this is what we WANT, this is what we are LOOKING for; this is what we are ASKING. At that point we have to stop and ask ourselves, do we love this person or the person they could be. Remember, drama mostly derives from our thoughts and feelings, not purely on what someone else has done. Very quickly, you can become the very thing you are trying to combat.
A true fruit of the Holy Spirit is self-control. We must have the ability to look within ourselves and know our thoughts, feelings, intentions, and actions. This self-control and self-awareness yield itself to stronger communication and relationship. During a disagreement, try describing how you feel with ONE word is all it takes. From there, you empower yourself, and you enable the one listening to you. Once you are aware of your thoughts and feelings, find a way to communicate them. Contrary to popular belief, we are not all mind readers. So go ahead and try it, “I feel…”
Once we know ourselves, we can see our partner in an entirely different light. While we can accept them as they are, they can understand and accept us. It’s freeing to know the only expectation at this point is the promise to love faithfully and sincerely as God asks us to.
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